So its that time of the year again when I promise myself I will make a ton of changes to my life and be super productive and creative and awesome and……. you know the drill.
Seriously man, do I really Lie to myself every year.
I guess I don’t. I do work extremely hard, and put a lot of energy into writing and learning about making films but i’m not sure its enough.
Well, truth be told, it isn’t enough. Not because the business is super competitive (which it is) and not because I haven’t really made much money in the field (which I haven’t) but because I personally don’t feel like its enough.
I feel like I put more of my energy and time into my day job than my writing and film making as thats the way life works.
I should be putting most of my time and energy and heart and love into the thing that I want to do with my life. The thing that consumes my every thought. The thing that I want to still be doing when i’m 80, not the thing that quite frankly I don’t want to be doing now, let alone next year and the years after.
Getting the right balance in life is tough, I’ve been trying it for years without great success so I’ve had a bit of an epiphany. Would it be so bad for my life to be out of balance more in the direction I want it to be. I’m not saying i’m going to quit my day job as i’ve got rent to pay and would like at least a little bit of a social life but how did I start putting my Retail job before my writing. That needs to tip the other way.
It times for the job to be just the hours I’m there, and even then film needs to creep into it more. Time for me to finally take control and stop making empty promises to myself that I can’t keep because of my day job.
Thats not how things are meant to work. You’re meant to follow your dreams, live them, enjoy them, be happy and somehow this year and every year after I will make that happen.
And hopefully this blog will track a fair bit of that.